This morning while riding the bus to work, I noticed a young lady drop something from her purse while she was getting up to leave. I was about to stop her when I noticed, in quick succession: (a) that several other people nearby were also about to catch her attention, (b) that we all saw that she had dropped a brightly-colored [vivid blue] “exotic” condom in a sleeve, © that we all independently neglected to say anything at all.
What should we have done? Over the course of the fifteen-minute ride, at least seven other people walked past the condom on the floor, noticed it, and left it there.
Signed,
Somewhere between a “Wise Crowd” and a “Smart Mob”
The proper thing to do, I believe, is to feign ignorance of the item’s nature and discreetly return it. Exotic condoms ain’t cheap, after all, and really not the sort of thing you want to reach for and not find.
But perhaps it would be best to have an old lady do the returning, with a wink.
Maybe it was a grand psychology experiment?
Great story!!! I think you _should_ ask Miss Manners. Or maybe Dan Savage (of the “Savage Love” column) would be more appropriate: http://www.citypages.com/authors/summary.asp?PPDID=1107
“The proper thing to do, I believe, is to feign ignorance of the item’s nature and discreetly return it.”
I watch way too much farcical comedy (currently: lots of ‘Allo ‘Allo) to stop my brain’s eye from seeing this unfold as it did.
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Pick it up and return it, saying “We’ll be like so needing this later, won’t we?”
or
“Oh, I love these! You know, you might want to try their Maxi-Ribbed Pouilly-Fuisse Lubricated Nonmetallics with Wings. I like to wear those inside-out!”
Who knows? You might make a friend.